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Writer's pictureZero (aka Charlie Nicely)

We Need to Normalize Autistic People as Caregivers, Lovers, and Healers

We need to normalize autistic people as caregivers, lovers, and healers. As an autistic person, I’ve experienced the most stigma and discrimination in healing spaces, and in particular, from other therapists. Second to that would be from white femmes (the two groups overlap greatly). There’s a myth in conventional society that says that autistic people are inadequate relationally and therefore insufficient at caring for others. This myth has been reinforced by mainstream mental health which has labeled us as having an impairment in social functioning.

 

Historically, those with neurotypes outside of the norm have been healers in many cultures throughout the world. We were wise counsel tending our communities, able to see beyond the material as we ushered in healing insights from the ancestors, the Earth, and the stars. In modern societies, we are seen as being socially and relationally impaired not because we are incompetent or incapable but because we are listening deeply to the great beyond and responding in an ancient voice within a society that has forgotten its mother tongue.

 

Our ways of relating don’t align with the dominant culture as it’s a culture that was born out of white supremacy. A culture of avoidance, dishonesty, comfort, disconnection, punishment, perfectionism and consumption. We are clear and direct truth seekers and truth tellers. We have capacity for the realities of discomfort and our bodies intrinsically remember how to move towards soothing and integration. We are agents of authenticity, radical acceptance, and belonging. We are as natural and unabashedly flawed as twisted oak, a deer receiving her last breath, or a chaotic fluttering of fireflies. We are creators and innovators, withstanding interpersonal tension as we clear a new path forward. We are seers with vision that penetrates pretense, niceties and social constructs. We are silent, sensitive and listening to the textures of the moment, listening to those beings and worlds within and beyond this one. We are profound and vibrant in our expressions, thunder in our mouths and lightening in our hands. Most of all, we are needed healers in a time of blaring social static, communal disconnection and ethical fracture reminding our lost siblings of the way home to themselves. We were not made in error or to hide behind a mask in service to the dominant culture, as only our unmasked selves make healing possible and relationships sustainable.





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